This is simply fabulous. And it’s so accurate!
The author lists 28 reasons why it’s great to be short. As a person topping the height charts at 5’1″, I have personally experienced the following:
– I’ve purchased kids’ clothing. (It’s cheaper. And today’s kids are stylish!)
– I’ve been used as a human measuring stick.
– I’m possibly the least intimidating person ever. This is probably why I have a squinty living under my house and bunnies feeding in my back yard. The animal world doesn’t fear me.
– I’ve won my fair share of limbo tournaments.
– I’ve never been hit by a bullet.
– Number 20 doesn’t apply to my life — animals and small children sense my un-intimidating-ness and gang up on me. It’s not pretty.
– Because small children gang up on me, I have no desire to fulfill Number 21 and be a “cute short pregnant woman.” (Although people have told me I’d look cute pregnant. Random. And somewhat weird.)
– I think John is more than a foot taller than I am. He may think he’s a giant, and he may start buying pants that are too long.
– I dressed up as Tinkerbell for Halloween. My costume was fashioned from a green t-shirt. I think I can cross Number 17 off my list.
– If I attempt to grow my hair out, my short neck will speed the process. Good to know!
– I think I tried on my mom’s wedding dress. And I think it fit — just barely.
– My personal favorite item on the list is Number 7. I always knew I was special.
– Hotel towels provide somewhat-reasonable coverage.
– I am an awesome shelf climber. I’ve scaled many a shelf at Hy-Vee.
– I’ve never been struck by lightning.
– And, finally, I don’t want to be the same size as my dog. The dog would most definitely eat me. Probably for breakfast.
Clearly, short people are superior in almost every way!