Smelly Cars and Christmas Trees

It’s been a rough week for my poor Hyundai. And it’s all my fault.

It all started when my friend Tami gave me a new Brussels sprouts recipe. I had to go to Trader Joe’s to get the ingredients. Duh.

I went to Trader Joe’s after kickboxing class. This meant I was almost ready to eat my own arm by the time I was done grocery shopping. However — there was a master plan. I bought a little jar of cranberry apple butter, and I decided to sample this on my drive home. That’s right — I eat cranberry apple butter straight from the jar. In my car.

I got in my car. I reached into the back seat and grabbed a jar.

I opened the jar.

And I heard a little *sploosh* — and noticed there was a lovely puddle of something on my car seat and sweat pants (my really attractive sweat pants with the elastic cuffs — I love them because they don’t get all wet and snowy in the winter, yet I realize the majority of society likely does not find them attractive).

Then I smelled something. Something briney…and not at all like cranberry apple butter.

Capers! The jar of capers and the jar of cranberry apple butter looked extremely similar in the dark.

Now my car smells like capers. And now I know why caper is not a popular fragrance for the little tree car air fresheners.

Fortunately, the caper smell diminished when a bottle of sparkling water exploded in my car. It was a sparkling flood. Classy.

In addition to serving as a dining car, my little Hyundai also transported a Christmas tree to my house!

I made sure I was taller than Christmas Tree 2011. It makes me feel superior.

Note the little Santa under the tree. That Santa and I have spent every single Christmas together. I’m convinced he’s the real Santa — not just one of those “helpers” who hang out in shopping malls.

There’s a picture of 1 1/2-year-old Laura sitting next to Santa on a couch. We were about the same size in 1983.

 

 

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4 Responses to Smelly Cars and Christmas Trees

  1. Meredith says:

    I love this post. All of it.

  2. Carolyn says:

    Yay for a pretty tree, short Santa and exploding sparkling water that works as a cleaning agent!!! 🙂 Mmmm….cranberry apple butter sounds delish!

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