My mom will probably read this and say “Lau-raaaa! Why did you write this?!” (She’ll secretly laugh. I hope.) But it’s partly her fault.
My mom is an enabler.
She buys way too much produce for family gatherings and sends it home with me. I love almost every kind of produce. A lot. And I feel very sad when it molds and had to go visit my compost pile. I feel like a failure.
So, I feel compelled to eat all the produce in my fridge. I could give it to others — but I don’t always like to share. I’d rather just stuff myself and suffer.
I present to you: Exhibit A.
It’s an empty container of blueberries. About an hour ago, there were approximately 18 ounces of berries in the container. Now, they are in me. They were delicious.
A few weeks ago, John emailed me a lovely link with 101 poop jokes. Most of the jokes were pretty bad, but a few made me chuckle. My personal favorite went something like this:
I ate a lot of blueberries, and my poop turned blue. But I did a little dance and it cheered right up.
I may have to dance and cheer later tonight and tomorrow.
In other news, isn’t this little fella cute?
It’s a tiny little water bottle in the shape of a bunny. He was an Easter present from my mom. (My mom knows that her 28-year-old daughter likes items intended for kids under the age of 8.) The bunny came to work with me today and really liked it. He took his hydration responsibilities very seriously. There were comments when I filled the bunny up at the water cooler, but the bunny and I took the comments in stride. It’s only a matter of time before my co-workers get bunny bottles.