What’s not to like about a holiday that celebrates pink, red, and sugary foods? Pretty much nothing.
This spoon is Valentine’s Day miracle! It’s a cookie dough smiley face!
Some people see the Virgin Mary in a potato — my mom noticed her cookie dough spoon was grinning back at her this morning. Since the spoon was used to stir little heart-shaped Valentine’s Day cookies, it must be a good omen.
My roommate gave me Valentine’s Day figs. Figs are a great Valentine’s Day present. Since they were a Valentine’s Day present, I should probably consume the entire package on Valentine’s Day. Anything less than 100% consumption would seem impolite.
In addition to my figs, I have Valentine’s Day “salad.” The “salad” was a gift from my mommy. Her hobby is feeding others. Valentine’s Day “salad” is a heavenly fluffy mix of cherries, pineapple, Cool Whip, sweetened condensed milk, and perhaps other goodies. It must be referred to as a “salad” because the recipe was plucked from the salad section of an old church cookbook. Anyone outside the Midwest would (and probably should) classify it as a dessert. But, who am I to argue with old church ladies? I might feel wrong eating dessert for breakfast, but “salad” can be consumed any time. In large quantities.
I decided to give my roommate an Eastertine. I just invented it. It involves hiding Cadbury Easter Eggs in various locations. Maybe it’ll catch on and become a new American pastime.